THE GEOTHERMICS OF HELL
Who says religion and science aren't compatible???The following is an actual question posed on a University of Washington chemistry mid term. The answer was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, which is why we now have the pleasure of enjoying
it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:
"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added.
"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then, #2
cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze."
The student received the only "A" given.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then, #2
cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze."
The student received the only "A" given.
posted by The Zarker at 2:20 AM
8 Comments:
The student deserved it! Like hell! :)
Btw, thanks for leaving comments on my blog. And best of luck with your newly found romance with the blogosphere!
Hi, of course you can link me :)
here's my link:
http://over-the-rain-bow.blogspot.com/
i'll link you too :)
Hmmm... U're giving me ideas .... Good one
wow!!tough blog!! :)
I like the last phrases.
thanks for signing in my guestbook,
i`ll link you up so we can get in touch!
happy weekend :D
just by chance got to see u'r blog. hmmmm Interesting discovery by me......
awwwMG... well deserved "A"!!
nice blog..intresting...
Zarker!
Where are you? I've been looking forward to your next post for AGES now...
Hope all is well.
Blessings...
A Whiff of change!
This reminds of a problem that we faced in our Field Theory Question paper when we were students of Electrical engineering. (Long time ago!!)
It goes like this. At that time there was an actor, I am not naming him; he used to blow rings of smoke in a film as a trait of the hero. That became quite famous.
The question was, assuming that the particles of smoke, the actor blew carried 1mV charge in them and that the diameter of the ring is expanding at the rate of x m/s and the ring itself is rising at the rate y m/s what would be the charge induced at the nose of the actor after z seconds?
Make your own answer!
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